A Movie Review of The Kingsmen

Abigail and Dolley readers I rarely go to action movies, like the Westerns of yesteryear they are largely passe' and trite.  Always full of huge explosions, thin plots, and improbable story lines, they bore me.  Since the introduction of CGI, film makers take the former overused devises and now assault your senses with dozens of slow motion "flying side kick" fight sequences.  The new technology has made it possible to portray women with equal or superior strength and skills to men.  ((Yawn)).  The Kingsmen Secret Service looked from the previews to be an exception. I joined the family for movie night, fully expecting a smart and well thought out action flick in The Kingsmen; I was sorely disappointed!  This movie is nothing but Propaganda with a British Accent - awful.

(Spoilers ahead) - Here are some of the messages:

The Green Agenda - people are killing the planet. The Earth has a fever and people are the cause.  There is nothing we can do to save it so people must be eliminated.

The Elite Agenda - Depopulation - there are only a few elite rich and powerful folks who will be saved from the coming Apocalypse.  They need to sign up with the evil organization and be saved or be eliminated with the rest of the lemmings.

Christians are Vile, Stupid, Bigots and need to be Destroyed  - The evil test case takes us in to a hate filled church, with rabid Christians spouting filthy words from the pulpit.  Plain looking, inbred congregants gladly cheer on the filth.  Consequently, the sound track to the mass murder scene is "Freebird".  For fun, let's take a Southern Rock Classic about a bird (maybe a dove) and free mankind from the evil Christians.  Even the hero can't resist the call to slaughter.

The Powerful Fighting Woman - The Kingsmen did add a surprising twist in that their superhuman villain enforcer who was a tiny woman with cut off legs - who through her superior legs was able to route any and all trained men who would fight her.

A Chip Implant will Save You - Straight out of the Book of Revelation, the elite have to take the implant chip to be immune from the coming chaos.  In a very sick twist, they end up being the ones destroyed just like in The Book.

A Scarred Savior - Lest it be completely unpalatable to the viewing public, we have the story of a fatherless kid from the wrong side of the tracks emerging as humankind's Savior.

The Nazis Where Not So Bad Agenda - this one is subtle and will fly under the radar for most people.  "Pick your Puppy" was a training and obedience tool purported to be part of training for the Nazi SS, in today's kinder and gentler portrayal of Nazis it is implied that the gun given to the new recruits was full of blanks.

Destroying the Human Race is not Evil - After all, nobody calls Noah a murderer, right?  These noble souls are just like Noah is the rallying cry as the elites wait somberly for the inhabitants of the Earth to destroy themselves.  Their leader gives a rousing speech and encourages them to Party!

The Deviant Sex/Sodomy Agenda - Just for a bonus, the very last shot of the film is of a woman offering her rectum as a reward for the hero saving the world.  Yes, that's right the Savior gets to sodomize a royal princess held in captivity - oh, yeah.

I was furious when we left the theater, sold a bill of goods!  The irony of the entire flick is that the elite are ultimately destroyed in their plot.  The enemy holds these pawns in as deep disdain as everyone else, he knows the future.  I believe that there are higher laws at work right now, a basic spiritual laws that fly under the radar.  You see, the Lord has told us what is going to happen, He has put it in writing and informed all who would read what the future holds.  The devil is bound by the same standard, he also has to tell you what the future holds, the lies that he tells.  Each of the above highlighted themes are lies, designed to destroy those who buy into them but ultimately to condition the public for the coming deception.  The only major theme missing from this drivel was alien intelligence but otherwise, it was all there.  This friends is the plan in a nutshell, this movie has nothing to do with the true King's Men.  Don't be fooled and don't waste your money.  The movie is a loser, just like the spirit behind it.

Bridesmaids - The Movie

Abigail and Dolley readers recently I spent a wonderful afternoon with a friend.  We had lunch and then a chick flick.  We heard Bridesmaids was entertaining and funny and since I was preparing for my 10th time down the aisle as a bridesmaid, it seemed like a great choice.  I will admit that I laughed, but much of the humor is about being embarrassed for the main character.  That kind of humor has always been unsettling to me.  You know what I am talking about, sort of that "Meet the Faulkers" humor?  I kept saying out loud, "Oh, no... don't do it..."  In addition,  there are parts of the movie so crude and disgusting that I just could not watch.

The movie is not appropriately titled, in my opinion it should have been called, "She's Coming Undone" or "Hitting Rock Bottom".  It was painful to watch the horrendous decisions the main character made throughout the entire movie.  Time and time again she self destructed, allowed herself to be horribly used, and succumbed to jealously and selfishness at an alarming rate.  She debased herself on a number of occasions and made a complete fool of herself throughout the movie.

2011 has been the most trying year of my life and I have said dozens of times, "How do people without Christ get through something like this?"  Behold, on the big screen was my answer in the form of Bridesmaids.  The character had no center, except that she loved to bake, it had been her passion and she stopped.  Everyone around her thought that if she would just bake again, her life would turn back around and she would find salvation in the "Nice Guy".  To give the movie credit, it took more than a cake to get her life back on track but even with the "happy" ending it was quite pathetic.  It left me feeling the overwhelming emptiness that must accompany those without faith and hope.

Ironically, I was reading a book called, The Upside of Down: Finding Hope When it Hurts. 
It is a work that takes the reader through life changing crisis and allows them to not only get through it, but to become stronger at the end.   It is a journey through understanding, accepting, healing, and empowerment.  It is a gentle reminder that God loves us even when times are tough and He is strong enough for us to rely and depend on him.  So if you find yourself at the end of your rope, do yourself a favor and do it God's way, otherwise you might find yourself starring in your own "Bridesmaids" movie.