Jun 30, 2011

Thanksgiving 2022

Abigail and Dolley readers I did not write this and if I knew who did, I would give them credit.  This was copied off a Tea Party Page on facebook, for now they have not shut those down...

"Winston, come into the dining room, it's time to eat," Julia yelled to her husband.  "In a minute, honey, it's a tie score," he answered.

 Actually Winston wasn't very interested in the traditional holiday football game between Detroit and Washington . Ever since the government passed the Civility in Sports Statute of 2017, outlawing tackle football for its "unseemly violence" and the "bad example it sets for the rest of the world", Winston was far less of a football fan than he used to be.  Two-hand touch wasn't nearly as exciting.

Yet it wasn't the game that Winston was uninterested in. It was more the thought of eating another Tofu Turkey. Even though it was the best type of VeggieMeat available after the government revised the American Anti-Obesity Act of 2018, adding fowl to the list of federally-forbidden foods, (which already included potatoes, cranberry sauce, and mincemeat pie), it wasn't anything like real turkey. And ever since the government officially changed the name of "Thanksgiving Day" to "A National Day of Atonement" in 2020, to officially acknowledge the Pilgrims' historically brutal treatment of Native Americans, the holiday had lost a lot of its luster.

Eating in the dining room was also a bit daunting.  The unearthly gleam of government-mandated fluorescent  light bulbs made the Tofu Turkey look even weirder than it actually was, and the room was always cold.  Ever since Congress passed the Power Conservation Act of 2016, mandating all thermostats - which were monitored and controlled by the electric company - be kept at 68 degrees, every room on the north side of the house was barely tolerable throughout the entire winter.

Still, it was good getting together with family. Or at least most of the family. Winston missed his mother, who passed on in October, when she had used up her legal allotment of life-saving medical treatment. He had had many heated conversations with the Regional Health Consortium, spawned when the private insurance market finally went bankrupt, and everyone was forced into the government health care program. And though he demanded she be kept on her treatment, it was a futile effort. "The RHC's resources are limited", explained the government bureaucrat Winston spoke with on the phone. "Your mother received all the benefits to which she was entitled.---- I'm sorry for your loss."

Ed couldn't make it either. He had forgotten to plug in his electric car last night, the only kind available after the Anti-Fossil Fuel Bill of 2021 outlawed the use of the combustion engines - for everyone but government officials. The fifty mile round trip was about ten miles too far, and Ed didn't want to spend a frosty night on the road  somewhere between here and there.

Thankfully, Winston's brother, John, and his wife were flying in. Winston made sure that the dining room chairs had extra cushions for the occasion. No one complained more than John about the pain of sitting down so soon after the government-mandated cavity searches at airports, which severely aggravated his hemorrhoids.  Ever since a terrorist successfully smuggled a cavity bomb onto a jetliner, the TSA told Americans the added "inconvenience" was an "absolute necessity" in order to stay "one step ahead of the terrorists."

Winston's own body had grown accustomed to such probing ever since the government expanded their scope to just about anywhere a crowd gathered, via Anti-Profiling Act of 2022. That law made it a crime to single out any group or individual for "unequal scrutiny," even when probable cause was involved. Thus, cavity searches at malls, train stations, bus depots, etc., etc., had become almost routine.  Almost.

The Supreme Court is reviewing the statute, but most Americans expect a Court composed of six progressives and three conservatives to leave the law intact. "A living Constitution is extremely flexible", said the Court's eldest member, Elena Kagan. " Europe has had laws like this one for years.---- We should learn from their example", she added. 

Winston's thoughts turned to his own children. He got along fairly well with his 12-year-old daughter, Brittany, mostly because she ignored him. Winston had long ago surrendered to the idea that she could text anyone at any time, even during Atonement Dinner. Their only real confrontation had occurred when he limited her to 50,000 texts a month, explaining that was all he could afford. She whined for a week, but got over it.

His 16-year-old son, Jason, was another matter altogether. Perhaps it was the constant bombarding he got in public school that global warming, the bird flu, terrorism, or any of a number of other calamities were "just around the corner", but Jason had developed a kind of nihilistic attitude that ranged between simmering surliness and outright hostility.

It didn't help that Jason had reported his father to the police for smoking a cigarette in the house, an act made criminal by the Smoking Control Statute of 2018, which outlawed smoking anywhere within 500 feet of another human being.

Winston paid the $5,000 fine, which might have been considered excessive before the American dollar became  virtually worthless as a result of QE13. The latest round of quantitative easing the federal government initiated was, once again, to "spur economic growth." This time, they promised to push unemployment below its years-long rate of 18%, but Winston was not particularly hopeful.

Yet the family had a lot for which to be thankful, Winston thought, before remembering it was a Day of Atonement. At least, he had his memories.  He felt a twinge of sadness when he realized his children would never know what life was like in the Good Old Days,  long before government promises to make life "fair for everyone" realized their full potential.
Winston, like so many of his fellow Americans, never  realized how much things could change when they didn't happen all at once, but little by little, so people could get used to them. He wondered what might have happened if the public had stood up while there was still time, maybe back around 2011, when all the real nonsense began. "Maybe we wouldn't be where we are today if we'd just said 'enough is enough' when we had the chance," he thought. Maybe so, Winston. Maybe so.

Jun 29, 2011

Transformers 3 Movie Review

Abigail and Dolley readers my guys and I got a sneak peak at the movie Transformers 3 - The Dark Side of the Moon last night.  In a nut shell, save your money.  That is unless you like brainless action with improbable story lines.  The movie felt very much like Independence Day, started out promising and ended up being hookey and campy.  Another comparison is Spiderman 3, all special effects and no real story.  Like the Spiderman trilogy, the Transformers trilogy slides with each installment.  I will say, at least in Spiderman they kept the same girlfriend.  Meghan Fox might be a pain in the neck, but she would have at least added some continuity to the story.

There are so many plot holes in the film it is hard to know where to begin.  The absolutely unrealistic relationship between Sam and his new girlfriend, Rosey is one of the most glaring.  They have no chemistry, she is far out of his league, and the viewer is left wondering exactly how these two are together.  In the end, we really don't even care.  Where was John Voit?  He was awesome as the Secretary of Defense in the previous films.  Instead, he is replaced by Francis McDermont who plays a complete caricature of a woman in power.  The viewer is intrigued with the addition of the very talented John Malcovich, but alas I am not even sure what he was doing in the story.  He dropped in, hinted that he was going to be awesome, and then disappeared.  

There are two distinct parts to the film, the story and then the action.  The producers abandoned any type of engaging story to simply spoon feed drivel.  They then put whipped cream on the turd in the form of loud and long spectacular action sequences and expect the adoring public to dig in.  It was special effects overload and frankly it got boring. My advise to Hollywood, spend a little more time and money on the story after all if you seen one Transformer go from a car to a robot, you've seen them all.

Jun 21, 2011

Bridesmaids - The Movie

Abigail and Dolley readers recently I spent a wonderful afternoon with a friend.  We had lunch and then a chick flick.  We heard Bridesmaids was entertaining and funny and since I was preparing for my 10th time down the aisle as a bridesmaid, it seemed like a great choice.  I will admit that I laughed, but much of the humor is about being embarrassed for the main character.  That kind of humor has always been unsettling to me.  You know what I am talking about, sort of that "Meet the Faulkers" humor?  I kept saying out loud, "Oh, no... don't do it..."  In addition,  there are parts of the movie so crude and disgusting that I just could not watch.

The movie is not appropriately titled, in my opinion it should have been called, "She's Coming Undone" or "Hitting Rock Bottom".  It was painful to watch the horrendous decisions the main character made throughout the entire movie.  Time and time again she self destructed, allowed herself to be horribly used, and succumbed to jealously and selfishness at an alarming rate.  She debased herself on a number of occasions and made a complete fool of herself throughout the movie.

2011 has been the most trying year of my life and I have said dozens of times, "How do people without Christ get through something like this?"  Behold, on the big screen was my answer in the form of Bridesmaids.  The character had no center, except that she loved to bake, it had been her passion and she stopped.  Everyone around her thought that if she would just bake again, her life would turn back around and she would find salvation in the "Nice Guy".  To give the movie credit, it took more than a cake to get her life back on track but even with the "happy" ending it was quite pathetic.  It left me feeling the overwhelming emptiness that must accompany those without faith and hope.

Ironically, I was reading a book called, The Upside of Down: Finding Hope When it Hurts
It is a work that takes the reader through life changing crisis and allows them to not only get through it, but to become stronger at the end.   It is a journey through understanding, accepting, healing, and empowerment.  It is a gentle reminder that God loves us even when times are tough and He is strong enough for us to rely and depend on him.  So if you find yourself at the end of your rope, do yourself a favor and do it God's way, otherwise you might find yourself starring in your own "Bridesmaids" movie.