The Narrow Path

It's called the path, the way, the narrow road, the walk, the race; this walk through life.  For believers, it's a narrow road that requires prayer, discernment, and discipline.  All my Scriptures and study for the last several weeks keep bringing me back to the walk.  One evening, the Lord prompted me to pick up a book I read in 1998, The Edge of Eternity by Randy Alcorn.  This is a fanciful, allegorical tale of a man who finds himself on a journey.  His only instructions were to take the red road and keep moving forward.  I enjoyed the book more the second time than the first.  So along those lines, I'd like to share with you some of the thoughts I have on this journey.

(Originally Published July 29, 2013)

As a prerequisite, realize YOU are on a path, ponder it, and consider carefully where you are headed. (Proverbs 4:26)  Everybody is walking toward eternity, good or bad; your choice (Proverbs 14:12) and (1 Corinthians 9:24).

Path to Hell

If you choose to follow Christ then here is a bit of a map.  (Proverbs 3:6)

First, the path is indeed narrow and only a few find it (Matthew 7:14).  In some places, it's a tight rope with deep chasms on either side.  These are the areas of your life where you have struggled the most.  One step to the right and you enter into the mire of the flesh; the willfulness in each of us that wants what we want and we want it now. (Proverbs 4:27)

Tightrope

Stumble to the left and you enter the despair and hopelessness of the evil enemy.  Sometimes, we bounce back and forth between the two sides, like a pinball caught between bumpers.  We cross over the path but don't plant our feet firmly on the ground.  On these tight rope sections, we are not capable of staying on the path in our own strength, through our own will, and by our own proclamation; we have to surrender to the Lord and let Him hold us up and get us through.  (Philippians 2:13)

Quicksand

Secondly, don't show off.  How many of us are guilty of trying to impress the Lord, to demonstrate how much we have learned, and how strong we are; we don't realize how often the quicksand is up to our necks before we call out for help.  I hope I stop getting in up to my neck.  It takes a humbleness of Spirit to ask for help, self sufficient, type A achievers like to be independent, we like to take charge and do it on our own; that way we get the glory.  Well, there is nothing glorious about being covered in quicksand.  No one in the Bible knew this better than Peter who writes (1 Peter 5:5-6) that we must be humble before the Lord.

Complacent Christian

Thirdly,  the narrow path has two sides along it entirety.  There is no part of the journey that is not flanked on either side with evil and the flesh.  There is no safe place to let down our guard and coast along, the Word warns us of complacency and if you've walked the path for more than 10 minutes you know this is true.  (Zephaniah 1:12)

Walk with Others

Fourthly, we must walk the road with others.  We are not strong enough to make it by ourselves.  We need godly friends, church folks, and family to help along the way. Help others, live justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God.  (Micah 6:8)

Pathway of Light

Finally, commit yourself to prayer and reflection every day.  If you seek the face of God in the morning, even if you went off the path the day before, He will set you right.  His mercies are renewed everyday.  If we check our steps regularly, we won't stray far.  (Romans 12:2)

He never promised the road would be easy but He did promise us eternal life in Heaven.  (2 Timothy 4:6-7)  So we strive toward the prize, we groan in our Spirits, we look forward to the end of the journey and to coming Home.  (Philippians 3:14)

What I Learned From Being Unemployed

Abigail and Dolley readers one of the hardest things I have ever experienced was unemployment.  The emotions, the fear, the anger, the embarrassment, the financial implications, the isolation, and the sheer upheaval can be overwhelming.  The subject is so broad, dozens of blogs could be written addressing any number of subjects from finances to finding a new job to dealing with the stress; consider this blog a strong arm around your shoulders, a warm cup of coffee, and some advise from somebody who has been through it.

Have a plan everyday, something you are going to accomplish and only focus on your goal for the day.  It could be something like this:  Prayer and Scripture of the Day, Exercise, Clean the Bathroom, and Grocery Shop.

Another day may focus on a job search item so it could be:    Prayer and Scripture of the Day, Exercise, Fill out Unemployment Application, and Update Resume.

Batch your job related days and do not look for a job everyday.

Insure that your plans fill the "work day".   The work day was brutal.  I seemed to relax after 5:00 because I was used to being home and the "work day" was over.  My tough times were in the day.

When some well meaning soul asks you "What are you going to do?", you can reply, "Well, all I know is that today I am cleaning out the garage and that's about all I've got right now.  I will figure out tomorrow, tomorrow."

Find the Balance

Abigail and Dolley readers the last few years have taught me that there is is a fine balancing act in this life and there is a path that we all walk.  I wrote pretty extensively about this last summer, I highly suggest that you read The Narrow Path to fully flesh this out.    So here we go... as I sit here contemplated the next words to write, it occurs to me that even in this there is a balance to be struck.  A balance between a full exposition of The Narrow Path for the reader who will not click through and for the other reader who has now returned to this post ready for more.  So let it suffice to say that the balanced, fruitful, and faithful Christian walk can be a tight rope in places and we must seek the Lord to help keep us on the right path.

As I've prayed this week, this balance has come back to the forefront of my mind.  Perhaps because someone recently chastised me for false modesty.  An honest compliment was given and I deferred.  In times past, proud as a peacock, I would have snatched that compliment up and devoured it like a chicken on a worm and then been pecking around for more.  Oh how times have changed!  I began to wonder, in my journey from pride to modesty have I again swung too far?

The extremes between two poles are easy to recognize but I am contemplating the nuance.  The line between realizing that no good thing lies in my flesh and assurance that I am living a life that is pleasing to the Lord.  Then immediately upon contemplating that I am doing well, realize all of the ways that I fall short and contemplating that I am a worm.  The swings between confidence and dependence; the false modesty where I put myself on the same level of the most debauched reprobate and then swing back to the full understanding that there go I except for the grace of God.

I have dissected my past mistakes ad-nauseum and as I contemplate moving forward I am loathe to repeat these mistakes of pride and self confidence.  I realize that I do not trust myself not to fall into the same trap again.  As the Lord answers prayer, can I pray in faith in confidence or will I become arrogant that the Lord is answering my prayers...I do not like being double minded nor can I put away a question that I have been gnawing at me, so I sought the Lord.

He gave me a Scripture that surprised me with it's simplicity and I have NEVER contemplated it in this light... this is a Scripture we use in times of suffering and trial, it is not one I've used to find grounding and balance but alas the Lord gave me, "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me.

Thus, in the nuance, in the gray areas, in the deep, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

The Beauty of the Lord

The Lord does not want us to stay the same, He delights in our growth.  He loves to show us new revelation, to give us glimpses of His character, His beauty, His power, and His magnificence.  To touch our hearts and flow through us like fire, wind, and water; to open our eyes to the deeper things of Him and invite us into the wildness of Him.  For I would rather spend one day in the presence of the Lord than a thousand elsewhere and I yearn with all that is within me when I shall finally be in His presence forever.

Cooking with a 12 Year Old Boy

Several months ago, my Son and I began a family tradition:  Wednesday Night Cooking with Mom.  It has been one of the greatest blessings of the year.  I have to admit that even though it has been a fantastic experience, like most things in life you have to get through the struggle to enjoy the reward.

Alas, he's 12 and asking him to do ANYTHING at this point in his life is a major inconvenience.  He grumbles and complains and every week tries to procrastinate.  He cops an attitude about choosing the meal and calls the whole thing stupid.  "Why do we have to do this again?" he moans.  I have to admit that on occasion I have blown my top... the idyllic bonding and instruction time does not always materialize.

Once I get him in the kitchen, it becomes a lesson in patience.  The hubby knows dinner WILL be late; it takes time to teach and a 20 minute dinner always takes exponentially longer.  It's a balancing act between proper instruction and letting him try things on his own.  Knife skills are particularly nerve wracking, every 12 year old boy wants to use the biggest knife in the block and chop with sheer strength and force.  Hot stoves, hot pans, hot ovens all have to be managed.

The World's Ugliest but Most Delicious Christmas Cookies (Not Exactly What I Envisioned...)

The mess... oh my goodness, it is a sight to behold.  Vegetables scattered here and yonder, flour... (now, even I make a mess with that stuff), spices shaken all over the stove, empty containers everywhere, spilled milk, two dozen dirty spoons, hot pans on counter tops, salt on the floor, a jar of honey dripping onto the counter... oh yeah, I spend as much time cleaning up after him as I do teaching him.

We sometimes argue; he insists he knows how to do something, like cut a tomato, and I witness what can only be described as a tomahawk chop about to come down on the hapless vegetable.  He doesn't appreciate my near hysteria at the explosion he is about to cause and says, "Geez, Mom aren't you over reacting?"

I drink while we cook.

That's become another part of the tradition.  I even share a bit with him.  That's part of the educational process, teaching him how to properly drink a glass of wine, how little it actually takes to get a buzz, and how quickly it can sneak up on you.  If I don't teach him how to properly handle and moderate his alcohol he'll learn it for himself. 

Sounds like drudgery, right?  Not by a long shot.  It seems that God sneaks in the kitchen when we aren't looking and makes magic happen.  Our food is wonderful!  Almost everything we've made has been delicious.  The Wednesday family dinners are the best of the week.  My normally finicky kid eats EVERYTHING he makes and now has a new appreciation for how hard Mom works to put on a meal.

We don't cook easy meals, we don't heat things up in the microwave; we cook.  It would be a lot easier on both of us if I bought simple box dinners for him and he nuked a couple of things but what would he learn?  What's the value of heating up something?  Not much.  Thus, our walk with the Lord is very much like cooking with your kids.  It's messy at times, it takes a lot longer than it should, we think we know what to do but we really don't, and sometimes we've got to have a glass of wine along the way.

Little Red Wagon

There is a street in my neighborhood that I avoid.  Perhaps all older neighborhoods have one of these streets; where the collective inhabitants have lapsed into apathy and exterior maintenance defeat.  The yards are more weed than grass, the shrubbery overgrown, the natural areas sport thousands of baby trees; no one has put out mulch for a decade.  It has a neglected feel and I always get the vibe that the people that live there are struggling.  I do enough of my own struggling, so I tend to avoid taking on more.  I haven't been down there in several years.

Today, the Lord prompted me to take that path.  I had just turned the corner and was expecting to be as frustrated as I usually was on this particular lane when I saw a neighbor had cut a huge bunch of bamboo.  There is a floor vase sitting empty in my house and bamboo was just the thing!  "Hmmm," I thought, "I listened to the Lord and right off the bat I got a gift!"  I inspected the piles, they were cut in perfect four foot sections and there were dozens of pieces to choose from.  I started to pick up a couple but freshly cut bamboo is heavier than you think.  I continued the walk but decided to return home for my little red wagon.

To my surprise, the street was in much better shape than it's been in years.  Some houses still need major landscape revisions but the feeling of hopelessness that had pervaded was no longer present.  One of the neighbors has built a spectacular water garden in their front yard and it seems to have prompted the rest to at least make an effort.  The mature trees gave the road a cool, shady feel; I was pleasantly surprised.  Overall, the morning walk was a peaceful and productive venture.

So I high tailed it home to procure my red wagon and retrieve my "treasure".  As I headed back out, I noticed that the wagon was loud!  Pulling it behind me, it made a terrible racket.  It disturbed the peace, drowned out the singing birds, and the church bells.  I could barely hear myself think and I certainly could not hear the still small voice.  Driving it in grass offered no improvement and made the footfalls uncertain.  The faster I walked, the louder it got.

My Little Red Wagon

Several years ago, we were treated to a sermon about how we pull our sins behind us, like bags of dung.  We know that we are forgiven but refuse to forgive ourselves and others.  We hold ourselves to a higher standard of forgiveness than God does and we pull our sink behind us.  Think of how arrogant that is.... Hilariously, the Pastor painted a picture of the size of the dung heaps we pulled behind, some had a small paper bag, some a bucket, and some a wagon.  Unfortunately, some of us have a pick up, and others have a tractor trailer.  What are you pulling behind you?  What stinking pile of dung do you need to leave by the side of the road?

I pondered dung for a moment but that was not my lesson for the day.  The Lord prompts us to be obedient and ask for forgiveness everyday.  Emptied before him, I have worked very hard to leave dead stuff alone.  No I wasn't carrying dung behind me, I had an empty wagon.  What then?  Then it hit me, my destination was stuff... I never think of stuff without thinking of the classic George Carlin bit. His perspective on stuff is spot on.  (I'm not putting a link here because it has really foul language, but if you can stomach his filthy mouth, check it out.)

Anyway, I realized how much harder it is to hear God and find peace when we are in pursuit of possessions.  When the purpose of our journey is to get things we miss the serenity of the walk.  We can not think because the noise drowns everything else out.  These folks are in chains, their lives have become a constant quest for the next thing that is going to make them happy.  Possessions cause a ton of futile work: you buy the stuff, put the stuff together, learn how to use the stuff, store the stuff, repair the stuff, clean the stuff, worry if someone breaks or steals your stuff, talk about your new stuff, and lust after the next and the newest.  They buy bigger houses than they really need to have room for all everything.  They rent storage units to hold their extra stuff and when they die nobody wants their junk!  The Lord is very clear in Matthew 6:19-20 “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. The constant lust for possessions crowds out charity, generosity, and enslaves those walking this path.  Revelation 3:17 You say, 'I am rich. I have everything I want. I don't need a thing!' And you don't realize that you are wretched and miserable and poor and blind and naked. 

I prayed, "Are you asking me to give up my worldly possessions?"  The thought was uncomfortable.  I don't love my stuff like some but I do like it.... He then opened my eyes in a very personal way, I have surrendered my stuff to him on a number of occasions.  The first time when my husband lost his job and took up pro-bono prison ministry - we gave God our stuff and said we will follow Him.  He released us from the curse of the Name it and Claim it.  The second time we gave up our stuff was because the "gift" we had acquired in our Name it and Claim it days had become an albatross and the load was too heavy to carry.  He released us from the overwhelming worry and burden.  The third time we gave up our stuff was when I lost my job a couple years ago, He showed us His hand of provision in the midst of the impossible.  No, this time he wasn't asking me to give up my stuff, I'd done that... "What then Lord?"  I asked.

"What will you do if I bless you?"  I thought for a moment and smiled, "I will offer you my stuff not as a surrender, not as someone who is willing to lose it for you, not as the World takes away, but as a crown I lay at your feet.  I will do this as an honor and a gift that I give back to you as an offering." I felt His pleasure; that was the answer He wanted to hear, that is what He wanted to teach me, and that was my lesson for the day. 

This life is a journey, it is a path that each of us must walk.  Your path will be different from mine but perhaps these are guideposts along the way.  Are you listening and obeying when the Lord prompts you to take a route even though you don't really want to go that way?  Are there gifts He wants to give you for obedience, if you would just listen?  Are you missing those blessings? Will you be pleasantly surprised that the path is much nicer than you expected?  Are you pulling your old sins, hurts, and failures behind you?  You can never ascend the high places pulling those burdens and you will smell bad...  Is your journey one to obtain possessions?  You will never have peace and quiet on that road.  You will spend you time in vain.  Have you surrendered your stuff to Him?  It is a terrible burden to pull behind you if you haven't.

There are no short cuts on this road, you do not get to jump on a high speed train and get to the end.  No, the road is long and at times difficult, perhaps these signs will help light the way. As for me, I long for the day when I lay it all at His feet.