As I was sitting there, I envisioned myself as a bee in a glass jar; frantically banging up against the sides, trying to escape. Bees are busy and made for work. I've never thought of myself as a bee but I guess I am. I prayed, "Lord, I keep hitting the sides of this jar desperately trying to break out. I have fallen to the bottom of the jar, exhausted and panting. I can not seem to make any progress no matter how hard I try."
|Bee in a Bottle|
Am I comfortable? Um, NO. Am I happy to be here? NOT! Would I embrace a change? You can bet your sweet "patootie" I would. In the mean time, writing this blog has been helpful and I'm coming to the realization that I AM protected and I AM cherished. Maybe I simply need to catch my breath, stop banging myself silly, and recognize that I am not out of this jar because I haven't tried hard enough. I'm not stuck in this jar because there is sin in my life, the jar is not punishment.
We strive on this Earth, in this body, always looking up. I think the lid is translucent and we see Heaven's light above us. We don't recognize it as Heaven, we think it is a place we are going to get to on this Earth, in this life. We think that if HE would just let us out, we would fly right into it and everything will be better. I don't think such a place exists here. Some days are sunny, the darkness held at bay. Even then, there is always something lurking, some turd in the punch bowl. This life is not Heaven and we aren't made to feel at home here.
I hope that if you are reading this and feel battered against the glass walls of your bottle, you will take heart that you are not alone. We all go through these times, take a rest, the Lord is in charge. I'm chillin' out down here at the bottom of my jar, my antennae are all crooked, one wing is jacked up, and that last crack to the head is making me sleepy. I am going to rest knowing that He neither slumbers nor sleeps and he's watching out for me tonight.