Apr 21, 2011

Holding Pattern

Abigail and Dolley readers I feel like I am in the hospital.  Everyday I wake up, stretch, take inventory and determine today is the day I will get to go back to life as normal.  I anxiously await the daily visit from the doctor and pray He tells me I can be discharged.  Up until now, everyday the answer has been, not yet you aren't strong enough.  I argue and fight and try to show that I am indeed strong enough but the wise physician will not be swayed and I am forced to wait.

I look back over these weeks and realize I have needed this time.  I know I have caught up on about 200 hours of missing sleep.  I don't have black circles under my eyes anymore.  I don't appear drawn and haggard.  I've lost weight, gotten back into shape, quit smoking, and am closer to God than I have ever been.  So while I have fought this "hospital" season tooth and nail, it has been good for me. 

I find myself pondering this Scripture: Romans 5:3-4 Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance produces character and character produces hope.

I am working on the rejoicing part.  I don't think it means we are masochists about suffering but that we realize when we are going through trials and tribulations that God uses that to do good works in us.  In the case of this verse to give us perseverance, character, and hope.  It is worth noting that hope comes last.  I guess if we had an abundance of hope at the beginning we would not develop perseverance and character as we aught.  That does not keep me from praying for it though.