The Reluctant Servant

Why do we always assume that God’s calling on our lives is something we hate?  Why have we been regaled with stories of the reluctant man used by God?  Where are the testimonies of people who sought God and He gave them a path that they loved?  The path was something that they were created for and they did not resist?  Why do we think that God’s calling is something we should dread?  Why have we glorified those stories in having glorified them planted within the minds of young and old that God’s calling on our life will automatically be something horrible that we do not want to do?

Struggling with God's Calling

Think for a moment, does this notion jive with what you know about the Living God?  Have you never sought the plan and purpose for your life because you dreaded what god would give you?  I did, and regret my rebellion.  When I finally submitted, when I finally let go, (see Being an Ant) I was blessed some weeks later with my dream job.  It was exactly what I was made for, it was a fulfillment of decades of work, and it was His good work.

God is a Loving Father

Instead of filling young people's heads with "Dreaded Calling", we need to encourage them.  We need to tell them that their Father in Heaven does not call them to drudgery and loathing but to their perfectly suited occupation and life.  I am not saying that it will be easy, because we know that life is not easy, but when you are operating in His will your soul will prosper.  After all, the Word says that we were created for good works, that He foreordained for us to do while we are on this Earth so that we might have His rewards in Heaven.

So, in this Season of Graduations, let me encourage you.  God has not called you to drudgery.  He has called you something perfectly designed for you.  Do not be afraid, He's your Dad.

Accepting God's Calling

Mary Poppins

Abigail and Dolley readers none of us are promised tomorrow.  I have had several fb friends pass away this Summer, all of them young, all of them tragic.  On my walk this morning, I was contemplating how short this life is and what if my life was asked of me today?  My husband and I faced that a couple of weeks ago.  I had complications after a routine surgery and had to have an emergency procedure.  Thankfully, things turned out fine but we did not know that going in.  Apparently, the doctors have to tell you the horrible things that can happen to you in surgery and get your consent.  This is perhaps one of the cruelest and scariest things you can do to a heavily sedated patient.  I thought there was a very good chance that I was going to die.

I had no one to call to make amends.  I didn't have anything I needed to say to my Husband.  I was ready to go.  I suppose that says something.  It reminded me of the week we spent with my Dad in the hospital, it just never seemed right to have "that" conversation with him.  We lived it, we knew, we loved.

In 2003, I read A Purpose Driven Life with the rest of America.  From that point on, I prayed "Lord, give me a ministry."  What I really wanted was to be a stay at home Mom and I wanted out of Corporate America.  After months of praying, one day He answered me, "I already have."  I got into my white Honda Accord and drove to the office, stunned.  How did I have a ministry?  I just went to work everyday.

As a new born again Christian, I had zealously shared my faith with everyone.  I was like a small flame that someone squirted lighter fluid on, I exploded with Christ.  Everyone got burned and that fire turned on me in the form of a woman at work I had been ministering to.  I gave her money, I helped her, I excused her bad behavior, I prayed for her and with her and in the end she turned on me like a rabid dog and I got in big trouble.  From that point forward, I was careful about directly witnessing to anyone at work.

Thus, four years later when I heard the words, "I already have." I was confused.  How was my job a ministry?  What in the world am I supposed to do with that Lord?  Slowly, he began to show me that it wasn't necessarily what I said, it was how I acted, how I loved, how I cared.  It was living my faith in color and honesty before an audience, who was watching.

Mary Poppins is a Temp

I was open with my struggles, I was honest about my mistakes, and my frailty and weaknesses have always been on display.  I try to play it close to the vest but the real me always comes out.  A few years ago as I was leaving a well loved job, a colleague compared me to Mary Poppins.  I love Mary Poppins, especially the I love to laugh song. 

See Mary Poppins flies in like a hurricane and blows the bad nannies away.  She marches in and takes charge, it's time to clean, it's time to repair, it's time to care for her charges.  The bosses don't know what to think of her, she often makes them uncomfortable.  In the end, everything is fixed and she leaves.  It was quite a compliment, it didn't occur to me until recently that Mary Poppins is a temp.

I have been a "temp" for the last few years, I have repeated the Mary Poppins routine several times.  I'm weary of it.  Mary Poppins is a tough job.  I asked the Lord, "Why?"  I was always stable; for the first 17 years of my career, I was with three companies... why have you moved me so many times these last five?  I knew the answer, there were many lives I was supposed to touch.  Part of me sneers at this, another part throws a fit that I don't want to do it anymore, and the other part is scared I did not do enough.  I think I did my best though, I know I tried.

A dear friend and colleague told me of a man and wife that came to the Lord through her witness, I had witnessed to her many years before.  Another confided to me that she would have left her husband and been a single Mother had I not shared my story of struggle with her.  Once a colleague commented that I was the most unique Christian he had ever known.  I know I have presented the Gospel to a couple folks who might not have ever heard it, I know that I was faithful in that one thing.

I feel small and defeated.  Potential employers looking at my resume will perhaps think something is terribly wrong with me... can I explain that I have simply gone where God has sent me?  I pray where ever He sends me next that I will have the strength to do what He asks of me....